What No One Told Me About My 20's // Wrap Up Vlog

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What No One Told Me About My 20's | Blog Series
In My 20's, I Realized It Wasn't All About Me
In My 20's, My Identity Ran Away On Auto-Pilot
In My 20's, I Got Lost in the Comparison Game
In My 20's, I Wasn't Prepared for My Son's Autism
In My 20's, I Didn't Know I'd Feel Discontent With My Dreams
In My 20's, Life Sped Up and When I Needed to Slow Down
In My 20's, I Have Complete Freedom and a Tremendous Amount of Pressure
In My 20's, I Involuntarily Broke the Mold

In My 20's, I Was Afraid I Was Too Young to Influence

I was 21 when I had the biggest faith crisis of my life.

My father, a pastor of one of those mega churches lots of people like, was embroiled in a scandal that would eventually take him down, temporarily out of the game.

And I was left to wonder things I’d never wondered before. 

Did God really care about me?

Did He see me, know my struggle to make sense of something hard?

Did He truly have a plan for my life or was I just the daughter of the pastor of things that went terribly wrong?

No one ever told me that I would one day question such things.  Not when I was sitting like a lady in my pretty Easter dress on Sunday.  Not when I was singing rhythmic VBS songs or running in the hallway of my beloved haven with a steeple.

Sweet little Jesus girls don’t grow up to be gritty grapplers...that is what I thought.

Some months later and with the help of a really intimidating shrink and {undoubtedly} the closet prayers of my mother, I reconciled such things and decided, in a new way, I would follow hard after God.  {Mainly, I admit, because He was the only One who hadn’t bailed…which now I find a really good reason.}

But my struggle didn’t stop there.  Because no one ever told me that in my 20’s, after I made such a dogged decision, that I would want to serve God but feel as though my age did not give me a real shot at influence.  It was this noise, constantly in my head:

Who wants to listen to a 20-something without the life experience, the marriage, the kids, the years that people say help you know yourself, know God, and really just…grow up?

What I did not know was that God didn’t need me to be any older for me to be radical.  Nor did He need me to disqualify myself or buy into what anyone might say about me being too young to really know anything about God.

He just wanted me.  My heart.  My desire.  My gifts to be used for someone other than me.  And He would insert the rest.

I needed to know this, as much as I needed to know months before that God was ok for me to question Him -- because a searching heart meant an inner hunger He would always be able to fill. And as I write this post, many years later, I am grateful, still, to know such things.

And so I say to you, my friend, 20-something or not, that is reading these words…

Search on.  Ask Him the tough questions.  And know that never are you too anything to do good Jesus work.

-Lisa
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In My 20's, I Involuntarily Broke the Mold

I am still in my 20’s, early 20’s to be exact. As I reflected back and thought about the last few years I realized they weren’t what I thought they would be. I certainly don’t mean that in a negative way but they haven’t been like that picture in my mind I had when I graduated high school, was getting ready for college, and getting ready for my twenties.

Let me explain. My married life is synonymous with my 20’s. I got married to my a-maz-ing husband 10 days after I turned 20. This was definitely not what I expected. I love my husband to death and would not have it any other way but I definitely did not expect to get married 2 years out of high school.

Here is the picture I had in mind when I graduated high school:

Graduate College à Get a Great Job à Get Married à Start a Family

I think that is what a lot of people generally expect because they are not necessarily told otherwise. First your go to college, after college get your good job, then your get married and then start your family. Life is all good.

Here is what my timeline actually looks like:

College for 2 years à Get Married à Wish I could finish school à Jobish… à

Stilling figuring out my career à Back to School?? à Family someday, but hey who really knows

Things don’t always turn out how they are “suppose” to but that is ok. I have had to let go of “the mold” of how things are suppose to be and my expectations to be able to embrace this bigger journey (and joy!) that God had planned for me. One with a path that has had some crazy curves and is defiantly not lit all the way. Everyone will take a different path. It is not always direct and the whole path is not always visible in the moment.

People also don’t always tell you that on your path you will fail. But again, it is totally a good thing. I look at each failure as just a try again moment. I have “failed” at quite a few things, ideas, career choices, etc. But God has brought each circumstance into my life to teach me more and more the direction I need to go. 

I am thankful for the things I have tried and the dreams that I have had that have not worked out because they have brought me to the direction I am going today. It may not be on that straight path I assumed I would be taking but the path I am on is the path of growth and that is even better.

The moral of the story is people don’t tell you, as you enter your twenties, that your path will be uniquely yours. It will not be the same as your best friend’s and it will probably not work out the way you plan for it to work out, you may even fail a few times. But good news! This is ok and even good! God is all about leading you and growing you into an amazing person for His purpose.

-Christina

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In My 20's, I Have Complete Freedom and a Tremendous Amount of Pressure

There are two major things I've learned in my 20's. Things no one really prepares you for, but once you're on the other side you think, Hmm, I guess that makes sense. 

1. It's going to take time and hard work to find and work a job and career you truly love. In other words, you may not "love" your job right away.

This is a big one for me. I'm such a future-oriented person and I remember being in college and longing for the days after graduation where I would no longer have homework and suddenly my life would be wonderful as a young professional. I'd work a challenging job that I enjoyed and came home to pursue fun hobbies, read books (for fun!), and spend time with friends. I'm not sure how I formed that idea, and while I do enjoy some of those things, I've learned that the stress and growing to-do list will be always be there nagging at me; it's just the list changes along the way. It's no longer homework and exams, but now it's being a good wife, starting my business and career. We may now have more control over stressors but they are also more ambiguous and require self-discipline. 

Which brings me to my next point...

2. You will have complete freedom yet feel a tremendous amount of pressure.

This one could just be specific to me as I tend to put a lot of pressure on myself, but I've noticed that in my 20's I'm feeling the pressure. While I am thrilled to have complete freedom in how I spend my time, I'm also feeling intense pressure. Pressure (from who knows where) to be productive, to follow a path, choose my career, and not look back. What if I'm not sure? What if I don't see myself working the same job for decades? What if I want to set my own schedule? I know this is all partly generational and due to my entrepreneurial spirit, but I think it is important to be open minded and flexible, take the pressure off of ourselves, try new things (and not be afraid to fail), and only work according to our own pace, no one else's. We will find our passion in our own time and own way; rather, it's more beneficial to focus on the present.

What do you think? Do you feel these things too? I'd love to hear. Thanks so much Julianna for having me! xoxo

-Colleen

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In My 20's, Life Sped Up and When I Needed to Slow Down

Life Skills 101
My life as a wife started on July 12, 2008. I was 21 when my husband slipped a ring on my finger. Only a year before that had I been welcomed into my twenties, becoming more independent and starting to assume a few of my own personal responsibilities.

I have always said I wish there were required classes along the path to adulthood that would teach the basics of life. Instead of wasting my time on a semester of calculus I would have greatly benefited from a class that teaches life skills.

Like, HOW on earth do you shop for a place to live and what exactly is in that 500 page book you are signing when you buy a house? How do I build and maintain a good credit score? How do I shop for car insurance? What are the pros and cons of buying and leasing a car? How on earth do I fill out my taxes? Dave Ramsey? Suze Orman, who?

I hit my twenties and found myself whacked with a mountain of nonsense and decisions I had no idea how to make. Deductables? 401K? Retirement? Income taxes? Property taxes? Portfolios? Roth IRA? What? Toooo many acronyms! I had no preparation on how to handle everyday-life details. Thankfully I at least knew how to balance a checkbook and make a budget. However, I would have gladly skipped college algebra for a Dave Ramsey class to learn to stay out of debt!

Now, having dealt with these issues, I'm more knowledgable. But shouldn't you have some idea about this junk before you're forced into it? Shouldn't you be forced to learn these concepts? They'll teach you geometry formulas but not about the details of financing? It has never made sense to me.

Slow Your Roll
Those are all practical things and can be overwhelming but there are more important things I wish I had realized.

This past September I turned 25 and almost had a complete breakdown over the event. Okay “breakdown” may be a little dramatic, but it really got to me. I couldn’t believe that five years had passed since I had entered my twenties. Those five years had flown by and in retrospect I felt like I had wished those five years away, wanting to be a grownup. I wish I had focused on living in the “now," learning and living in where I was at the moment. I wished I had absorbed every detail. It’s cliché, but the older you get the faster time goes by.

Having long-term dreams and goals is important, but we have a lifetime to work on obtaining those. It can get frustrating waiting in that desert that is "In the Meantime" - that phase of our lives where we feel like we are stagnant. But there are times in our lives where we need to practice stillness and simply live in the moment, even if it's not where we want to be. It's a pit stop.

For the past three years I've been working at a job that has absolutely nothing to do with my overall goals. It's a job I got in order to pay the bills. I would beg God to please open a door for me to walk through that would lead me to a more creative path and get me on my way to getting my book published, or my big screen debut, or starting my successful business. So many times I would feel a sense of peace that he was working behind the scenes on my behalf. I felt it was my job to stay faithful to where he had me at that moment in my life. 


We are where we are in life for a reason - to learn lessons, to build character, to form relationships, and to be a light in the lives of others. When we focus on being faithful to where we are, at some point in life that effort will be rewarded. We just need to be patient.

One more thing...
Teenager beware. No matter how skinny you are your entire life, be aware of your metabolism. It exists and it really does slow down. Just listen to my 25 yr. old size 8 pants warn my 13-21 yr. old size 2 pants. They'll let you know. Exercise and eat right.

And one more thing I'd like to add...
Ladies, wear a bra because those puppies can't hold themselves up forever.

You can take that one to the bank.

-Hannah
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In My 20's, I Didn't Know I'd Feel Discontent With My Dreams

When I entered my 20's, no one ever really told me that you don’t have to take the typical route! Fortunately, I have parents who have always been super supportive of me, allowing me to try five gazillion different activities as a kid until I found my niche. Turns out I am still doing that through my 20’s. I am 27 now and so far, the 20’s for me has been one crazy roller coaster. 

In high school, everybody tells you, “Reach for the Stars!” “You can do whatever you put your mind to.” You know, the usual inspirational comments teachers give their students. But, I couldn’t help but notice I was no more a student then I was a cow being corralled along with my peers into the “College” meadow. So I followed. I even declared a major and played intramural sports, but halfway through my freshman year I realized this was so not me. 


Some of my professors tried to talk me out of it, but I had my mind set. I applied to do a missions school in Brisbane, Australia the following Fall. My parents supported me under the condition I pay off my college debt before I went (GOD BLESS THEIR SOULS! I am so thankful for that condition!). About six months later I was on the start of my counter-culture education track. I traveled as a missionary. 


I started a local music festival. I volunteered A LOT, whether at a TV station or as an event manager for dance crews, artists or musicians. I took courses of interest, like Leadership or Organization Resource development, at schools that were field focused. I did this for about four years and all while being single. 


Then came the haze. In walked this adorable guy and after almost a year as friends, we were totally hooked! I spent another year abroad, dating via Skype and letter writing. Nearing marriage, I decided to move back to the states, living in Pennsylvania and then finally moving out west to be in the same town as Dustin. In the three years I lived there, I married Dustin, volunteered two of my summers to train and take college students overseas on missions and worked as a youth coach as well as working at a non-profit organization, Light Gives Heat. 


Then, this past October, my husband got a career opportunity in Nashville and so it once again became time to move, this being move #9 since graduating high school. 

This leads me to my second thing that nobody told me about my twenties: You have to choose to live with contentment in any route you take. I chose the unconventional road of schooling. Instead of sitting in a classroom, the world became my classroom. I learned soo much during those years and so much beyond just education. I loved learning this way. 


But as I lived my dreams, I became envious of others. With every move, my “dream route” was getting super tiring. You know that John Mayer song, “All we ever do is say Goodbye”? That song could be about my life! My "home" was spread around the world and I didn’t have access to it as often as I liked. My friends were now scattered all over and I missed them dearly. But you're not supposed to have discontentment in your dream life, right? Wrong. My biggest lesson in my 20's is learning how to be content right where I am.

---

There are going to be sacrifices either way you go. The grass is not always greener on the other side. I remember talking to someone, who had gone the college to marriage route, about how they thought my life was so exciting. I remember distinctly thinking that, to me, their life actually seemed way more appealing as they had stability. They had friends and family around them all the time. They had a consistent paycheck and could afford little luxuries. 

I wouldn’t trade the route I chose to take, but I have learned that what seems glamorous at first isn’t always the case. No matter what path you choose to take in your 20’s, you can’t escape hardships.

So allow me to be be someone who told you that the 20’s can be super exciting! 
You can achieve things that don’t seem possible as a teen, but you also have to be prepared to sacrifice. If you want to work at a non-profit, be prepared to work harder then you are compensated for. If you want to have a job that travels all around the world, it will be incredible but don’t be surprised when you miss your friends and family and eating out loses its luster. 

As pessimistic as this sounds, I actually say this so that you can prepare to be optimistic when these hardships come your way, because they will! Optimism is part of what has gotten me this far with no signs of stopping! Move #9 has been dream turned reality, but not without it’s own set of struggles to overcome! 


Stay positive, be humble, work hard and go for it!

-MK, From the Guest Room
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In My 20's, I Wasn't Prepared for My Son's Autism

“Your son has Autism. I’m sorry,” she said.

Our pediatric psychologist’s words hung in the air, somewhere between me and my husband, as we struggled to really hear what she had said. I remember not being able to make out her face, although her kind eyes have stayed with me. She said the word “Autism” so freely, with a hint of callous. This sentence was a regular part of her job. “Your son has Autism. I’m sorry.” Apparently, shattering parents’ dreams was a constant in her office.

We drove home from Rady’s Children’s Hospital in silence. Dark clouds covered the San Diego sky. I felt the rain was fitting; the heavens were crying, weeping for our boy. My 25-year-old heart quietly broke into 1,000 seemingly irreparable pieces.

Aden slept peacefully, beautifully, in his car seat. He was unaware of my suffering, of my anger and he didn’t see my tears. One moment, I was sad, the next moment I was furious, confused, indifferent, happy that we had an answer but afraid of the future. Who was this girl? Who had I become in a matter of moments? I wasn’t used to the instantaneous flux of emotions that flooded me, and my poor husband certainly wasn’t used to them either. With whatever strength I had left, I decided to fight. I would fight for my son; Autism would not swallow our family whole. I knew it would be one of the biggest battles of my life.

Over the next few months, there were a flurry of appointments, meetings, services, therapies, educational meetings, goal setting, diet changing, preschool. My emotions were unpredictable. I wondered if there were other 25-year-olds, who were aching over their children the way I was. I wondered if those same 25-year-olds felt as angry as I did, as desperate as I did, and as determined as I did.

I also wondered, why, why in the world no one prepared me for this? 

Why didn’t someone sit me down, and tell me that eventually, reality would hit me right upside my head, and that I would fall apart?

I thought that school was difficult. I knew that marriage was difficult, but this? This was ridiculous. I became fearful of play dates, of his interactions with other children. I was full of anxiety and ready to pounce on any poor person that looked at him the wrong way while we were in Target.

In my ignorant mind, at 25, I was supposed to be achieving goals, smiling every day and making the world a more beautiful place. Instead, I was dealing with tantrums, speech therapy, and more nutritional supplements than I’d ever seen. Looking back, I know that Aden’s diagnosis was a turning point for me. Through this ordeal, I learned to identify my feelings; I specifically and quickly learned the best way to deal with them. I suppose this is when I truly grew up. At some point we settled into this life. Slowly, cautiously, I allowed myself to feel hopeful, to feel happy again, to feel at peace with what we were going through.

Eventually, I had done every thing that I could possibly do for our little boy, and I had to give the rest to God.

Today, Aden is a 5 and a half-year-old little boy, with a beautiful spirit and a zest for life. He loves to read, swim, go to Disneyland and play the violin. He has age-appropriate conversations with us. He plays with his friends, and is in a normal class room at school.

He is, quite frankly, the most remarkable child I have ever met, and I’m grateful that this blond haired, little boy helped me realize who I am. 

-Katie

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In My 20's, I Got Lost in the Comparison Game

As I was crawling out of bed on my 23^rd birthday I hit my shin on the metal bunk bed in my college dorm and I stumbled over to the mirror to stared at my face as I forced a smile full of braces.  I remember fighting back tears hating the fact that I was nowhere I thought I “should” be at 23 years old. I was still in college without a husband, let alone a boyfriend, a mouth full of braces, and sleeping in a bunk bed. 

Let’s just say that wasn’t my favorite birthday that I have ever had.

For as long as I can remember I have been a comparer. If it wasn’t my peers, it was my sisters. “I’m not as smart as Julie is.” “I’m not as tall or pretty as Jamie and Julie are.” I remember in my mid-twenties I would literally get sweaty and sick to my stomach before I would go visit with my childhood friends. I would think as I was driving to meet them, “They have it together. They have their own homes, husbands, jobs, and money.” I would try on 20 different outfits and then take my college self out to coffee with them. I am sure that they were not 1/10 as critical of me as I was of myself, but I got lost in the comparison game of  how life “should” look for someone in their 20’s.

Now that I am out of my 20’s I can honestly say that time was the worst and hardest decade of my life and it was all because of the unnecessary pressure that I put on myself to be and look a certain way. 

I wish that someone would have sat down with me and told me that there was no such thing as normal and that I was free to be who I wanted to be and pursue what I wanted to pursue because my life was my own. I had amazing people in my life so maybe someone did tell me that but I was so consumed with comparing that I couldn’t hear them. Looking back now I see how much I missed out on because I was so concerned with finding a husband, being pretty, funny, and cool.

God has made us all unique with our own passions, hopes, and dreams. The journey I am on not does not look like what I thought it would or what I hoped it would growing up and even into my 20’s. In saying that, I would not have it any other way. I love looking back now and seeing the timing of it all and God’s hand all over my life. 

If I had about 25 pages to write I could tell you down to the specifics of God’s amazing timing and unique design with my life up until now, and that would just be the stuff that I knew of, not the stuff that I may never know.

I couldn't be more honest in telling you I am beyond thankful that I didn’t get kids when I wanted them, a husband when I wanted him, college when I wanted it, or a career when I wanted it.  The life that I lead now is beyond anything I could have asked for or imagined. I’ll be celebrating 6 years being married to my best friend this year, we are in the process of adopting children, and I started an organization working with teens that I am so passionate about.

Cherish these days young friends. 

Make the season that you are in right now the best season of your life. You will never get it back. God is doing something totally different in you than the person next to you. The biggest disservice that you can do to yourself is compare and wish that you were someone or somewhere that you aren’t. Embrace today!

-Elizabeth

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In My 20's, My Identity Ran Away On Auto-Pilot

On my 25th birthday, I had plans to meet my dad for lunch. He called me around 11am to say that he had gotten really busy and wouldn't be able to meet me afterall. And I started to cry. The big old gasping ugly cry. He was stunned and felt awful and rearranged his day to meet me, but my funk never left me.

That day, I was never more aware of the fact that I was in a new job that I didn't like, had just moved backed to California and didn't have any friends. I was overweight, living at home and painfully single. I wasn't living up to the expectations I had created for myself. The he list of things I was unhappy with could go on and on, creating within me a giant pity party. I was smack dab in the middle of my QUARTER LIFE CRISIS.

I can remember my best friend turning 25 the month before me. As I joke I'd bought her a book about the Quarter Life Crisis, something I didn't think it was a real phenomena. But after a week or so of these birthday blues, I realized there might be something to this.

I was experiencing a quarter life crisis and mine was clearly about my identity.

I didn't know who I was anymore. At about 25, we're usually no longer students or living at home and we've been in the workplace for a bit. We're usually exhausted with the responsibilities of bills, roommates, deadlines, time commitments, and adult life. We forget to invest in ourselves the things that rejuvenate us. And both the clock and calendar move on without us really knowing it.

And suddenly, it hits us, like an avalanche of confusion and emotion. No one had prepared me for the psychological roller-coaster one experiences in their 20's. I didn't know who I was anymore and where I really wanted to go from here.  

For me, I had gone away to college, then moved to DC to start a career. Everything was fresh and shiny and important for a while. Then major changes occurred, and I realized my life was no longer fresh and shiny. I had been on auto-pilot and I felt lost.

---

Maybe your story is different than mine. Maybe you are married, entered the working world directly after high school, or even have a baby by now. Maybe you haven't moved across the country and life feels just as it always has.

However, even if that is the case, I'm guessing there are some form of growth spurts and stretch marks on your soul. Frustrations that have appeared that you really don't know how to deal with because sometimes, you don't even recognize yourself.

This last November marked ten years since that sad little birthday lunch and I look back on that day in relief. Relief because with time and maturity, I can say with all certainty, IT GETS BETTER!

We begin to learn that our identity doesn't come from being someone's child, attending a certain school, being someone's roommate, or the new guy at the office. We learn that our identity comes from how we handle new situations, treat people, and inwardly reflect.

I won't give you the Sunday School answer and say that I automatically clung to my identity in Christ. No, while that was present, it still took time to figure myself out. Who I wanted to be outwardly and how I wanted to be portrayed came through time. I made friends and built hobbies. I found a new job that valued my skills. I bought my first condo. I volunteered at my church. I started to spend time doing the things I liked. And before I knew it, I had built a life that I loved and an identity that I recognized.

I had grown up.

I share this with you to encourage you and also to let you know that if you're in a similar quarter life funk, I understand how you feel. 

There's no direct route or easy path to owning your adulthood. As a kid, we can't wait to get here, but it doesn't happen automatically; and that's where the growing pains set in. But once again, believe me, you'll be 35 before you know it and you'll know exactly what I mean. IT GETS BETTER!

-JJ, aka the Blah Blah Blahger
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In My 20's, I Realized It Wasn't All About Me

I was one of those girls waaaaaay back in my teens and 20's who could never be told anything.
I didn't want or need advice because I had it ALL figured out.
I knew better.
I saw things more clearly.
I had life by the reigns and I was in control.
{Oh how I wish I had, cause now I'll take ANYONES help and advice!}


My first wake up call was about the age of 19.
I'd been a bit wild and reckless, both with guys and partying for a few years. You know, just going through the normal teenage rebellion type phase.


But one night at a party, when things started to get heated and emotional, I sat there watching it all unfold and all I could think was, "What has become of my life?  Who are these people, and are they even my friends?  Why am I even here being involved with stuff like this?"


I went home that New Years Eve night and wrote out all that I wanted to change in my life. The next day I woke up and made a decision to walk away from that crowd and that way of life.


I got back involved with my church, and then a few months later decided to pack up and drive to California to start all over. All by myself, not knowing a single person. It sounded lovely and amazing. Doing such a thing now, in my 30's, would send me into a panic attack.


But that's the the thing about your 20's. You're still kind of a child, but also starting to ease into adult life a little more. For me at that age, it was about taking risks. Being wild and free. Loving hard, and feeling deeply.


It was all about having fun, really. I just wanted to sleep, go dancing, hang out with my friends, meet hot boys, and have FUN!  


I found an amazing church, incredible friends, and tried to find a balance between the world's way of fun and my faith. I was walking a thin line between the two, but I felt it was at least better then where I had been before.

It was all about me, all about fun.

But, then at the age of 23 I lost my dad due to a fatal heart attack. My whole life was turned upside down and my perspective drastically changed. Life was not fun anymore. I was confused, broken, lost and hurt.


Suddenly the guys I had been dating weren't so fun and they definitely weren't there for me when life became real. I realized I had been giving my heart to so many that weren't worthy of having something so special.


And then I met Jimmy.
We had met briefly before my dad died, but it wasn't until after, that our friendship really grew into something deeper and more meaningful. He was there for me, not asking for anything, not needing anything, not playing games, not being anything but loving, comforting, and real.


Without intention, I found myself beginning to pull away from the guys I had been "dating" and found myself instead wanting to spend more and more time with Jimmy. Within a few months, we found ourselves madly in love, ready to take it from friendship to engaged.


{Yes.  We moved fast.  I wouldn't recommend it really. For those of you in your 20's....}


I share all of this to bring you to THE moment in my 20's where I had one of my greatest wake up calls.


You see, Jimmy had been a "good" boy. He never partied and NEVER got drunk. But, the biggest thing was that he had saved himself for the woman he was going to marry. And to me that meant everything. It made me love and respect him even more. However, it also made me dread having to tell him the full truth about my past, because it most definitely wasn't squeaky clean.


You see, my philosophy had always been to just have fun now and make better choices later when I was "grown up." I had only ever really thought about myself.

I hadn't thought about the day that all that fun could potentially really hurt someone else.

But the day that Jimmy and I finally had the talk about my past, was one of the hardest moments of my life. Seeing the hurt on his face, and the tears in eyes, literally broke my heart because all my fun and all my selfishness was now breaking his.


It took months, maybe even a year for us to heal and recover and without a whole lot of prayer and God's healing touch, I'm not sure we would have made it. But it was in THAT moment that I realized and knew, this life God had given me, it was SO not about me.

My choices were not just going to affect me, they had and would continue to affect everyone in my life that loved and cared for me.

That moment was a life changer for me. Every day, from that point on, I made every effort to fully give over my life to the Lord, and let go of all the selfish ways I'd been holding onto for the sake of "fun." My way was hurting others, and I knew God's way was so much better.

I realized it all comes down to choices.

Unfortunately, sometimes it takes walking a very hard and painful road to learn the greatest lessons.

I still have fun.
I still love to dance.
I still love to take risks (except with food, my hair, and moving). But now, I take a moment to pray and intentionally think beyond me.

I lay it all down before the Lord and I allow HIM to take the wheel.

{If this was a musical, Carrie Underwood would now come out and sing "Jesus Take the Wheel."  But, sadly, it's not. It's just a blog post. No singing here. But you're humming it now, aren't you?}

And let me tell you, it is so freeing, so fun, and nobody gets hurt that way.


And that, you guys, is the thing I wish I could tell everyone in their teens and 20's.
{And MAKE them obey me!!!!}

Think beyond yourself.

If you do this now, you'll save yourself and so many others a world of hurt.

Or don't obey, and learn for yourself the hard way. But don't say I didn't warn you!

-Summer
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What No One Told Me About My 20's | Blog Series

It was the day after my 23rd birthday. I was getting dressed and ready for the day and realized as I zipped up my jeans that they were feeling a little snug. Jeez I really need to get this wedding weight off, I thought. The next couple months I started really watching what I ate. I went no carbs for a while, then no caffeine. Then no nothing. I started mildly exercising 3X's a week but the scale wasn't budging. What happened!? I use to be able to drop 2-3 Lbs by just thinking about losing weight. 

I quickly realized, I'd crossed over. I'd crossed over to the side of youth that one can never come back from. Am I being a little dramatic? Yes. But that's only because no one warned me! Everyone prepares us for puberty and other womanly issues, but there's no class or curriculum or warning that 22 was my prime bathing suit age, that I would begin to feel overwhelmed at the site of gas prices, that I'd be questioning every decision I ever make and that my spirituality wasn't going to grow itself. 

It all just kind of happens. 

So I've decided to put a little dent in this world of educating girls in their 20's. Especially those entering. This is going to be fun/semi-disturbing for you. 

I've asked a number of amazing women that I know (both from real life and from the wonderful world of bloggers) to share with us their pivotal "20's" moments. Circumstances that no one ever warned them would happen or life changing moments they thought would never happen to them. Though each story is unique, we can all relate to the principles of change and growth. 

Their stories will start Tuesday and cover these four (4) themes: psychological, physical, emotional, and spiritual.

But I don't want this to be a passive series, where you read, chuckle to yourself and close your browser. I want you to read, laugh, cry, talk, and tell us your story too! 

Here's a couple ways to do that--

--Write a blog post with one of the prompts below and Tweet, Comment or Facebook us your link! 

What did/do you feel unprepared for in your 20's? // What do you wish you would have known when you entered your 20's? // What would you do differently in your 20's? 

--Tell the authors if their story resonated with you in the comment section of the post. 

--Ask questions! About their stories or stuff you're going through. Get advice.  

--Like to talk more than write? Make a video! And Tweet, Comment or Facebook us your link!

I hope you will join us this week and happy reading! 

XO, Julianna